I am dating this woman who is really getting on my nerves. She’s got a lifetime of bad decisions right on top of another, and rather than learn from them and make good decisions, she either blames bad luck or says God is “testing her”. I call bullshit. How can I make her see that she is an adult and needs to step up and start thinking about the consequences of making bad decisions?
I totally agree with you. Whether or not you’re a religious person or not, a bad decision is something people need to own up to. If you’re broke, have had a string of bad relationships, and a lifetime of “bad luck”, there is a 99.9% chance it’s not God testing your devotion, nor when something good happens is it God’s blessing you with one good luck moment. Before anyone religious gets upset with me, let’s look at the facts from a religious perspective. When God tested people (in any religious book), it’s been with a SEVERE test like killing someone, facing a flood, a plague, death of a baby, etc…not a crappy boyfriend or getting fired from a job you slacked your way through. Those aren’t tests. Therefore, when something good comes along to break up the pattern of bad, it’s not necessarily God blessing you with a good thing (his blessings come in the form of redemption, feeding the masses, impregnating a woman without touching her, etc.,). Instead, you’ve failed to recognize that you’ve made a good decision. According to any religious doctrine, God’s not the one bringing sunny days after cloudy ones..he brings them all, cloudy and sunny alike. You deal with the little details, he deals with the larger ones.
Your friend seems to have a confused sense of religious devotion. The next time a bad decision is made and her luck turns “bad”, try to show her the good decision she should have made and encourage her good decision making skills rather than just point out the bad decisions when they happen. Again, good, bad, God, and the Devil are all in the details..but in the bigger picture. Daily life and decisions are your duty.