I am a long time reader and first time writer that is hoping you can help. I grew up here in Montana but after an entire 23 years here, I want to move because there’s just too many bad memories here. I’ve had two of my last three boyfriends break my heart by leaving me and the third I just found out was cheating. It seems like I keep getting my heart broken for no reason. My friends in Fargo keep saying I should come live with them, but it’s kind of a drive and I want to make sure I’m doing the right thing. Should I go? Is a fresh start what I need?
A fresh start is what you need, but moving won’t solve it. I emailed you asking for more info on the breakups but you didn’t respond, so I’ll go off of what you’ve said above. You got your heart broken by guys who left you. People don’t leave for no reason, so there’s something there either you’re hiding or you didn’t take the time to investigate. The third guy also broke your heart but cheated on you, so that was obviously different enough of a situation to explain apart from the other two. Your friends (who may or may not be guys) are in Fargo saying you should move out there with them because they feel that running away from your issues may be a positive thing. Did I get all of that right? I think that’s the last thing you need. If you are having issues with yourself or with choosing the right people, that’s a problem that will only follow you if you leave. You need to take some time for yourself and straighten things out. The reason I think it may be an issue with you is because you said you get your heart broken “for no reason”, which signifies you are either totally oblivious to what’s going on in the relationship, or you’re in denial about it. Either way, it’s something that you need to fix.
Think of it this way, does running away from a burning house work if your the one on fire? No it doesn’t. You need to put out your own flames and maybe then you’ll see that life in your town isn’t so bad.