The problem with Amber.

Monkey and "Blonde" Woman

Bring back my monkey Amber! Amber! Do you hear me?! Amber!

MNT wrote:

I have something weird to figure out and I am hoping you can help.  I like blonde women with tattoos and piercings.  I know it’s particular, but that’s my type of woman.  Here’s the weird part.  I’ve dated three women in the last year (all of which I met online) and they all turned out to be named Amber.  The even weirder part is they all had the same characteristics.  The EVEN weirder part is I tried dating a brunette with tattoos but she was also named Amber!  Do I just have some sort of freaky Amber magnetism?  These relationships don’t go well, Ambers seem to be a materialistic, needy, superficial, and money hungry bunch.  I’d hate to believe I am destined to attract those types.

MNT

MNT,

Let me first say that I know many Ambers that aren’t blonde with tattoos.  Let me also say that I know many Ambers that are good people that don’t possess the characteristics you seem to be encountering with the Ambers you meet.  That said, yes..you seem to have some weird talent for attracting Ambers, but it’s isn’t the name you’re attracting, it’s the personality characteristics.  I’d love to see whatever dating profile you’re using because I am guessing it’s the “I’m a rich douchebag with lots of material toys and I like to party” type of profile and that will attract the types you are trying to avoid.  You may not be TRYING to put off that image, but you’re doing it.

Since you didn’t respond to my request to see your profile, let me give you the following advice:

1.  Remove all shirtless pictures from your profile.  Flexing and posing in a dating profile makes you look like an idiot to 99% of people on a dating site.

2.  Remove pictures of your house, car, boat, motorcycle, etc., from your profile.  There are people who love those pictures, but they’re more concerned about how much money you’ll spend on them and not concerned about a good relationship.

3.  It’s okay if you like to go out once in awhile, but don’t post a bunch of bar/club/party pictures on your dating profile.  It makes you appear superficial and like you don’t have your priorities straight.

4.  Don’t talk about your job in-depth, don’t mention your salary, don’t mention the fact that you travel all over the world when not working, and don’t mention things from tip #2 above in your profile.  You will simply look like a pompus a-hole by talking in depth about these things.

5.  Don’t use professional modeling pictures for your profile pictures.  I don’t care how great you look with an open white button down shirt, you’ll attract the wrong types.

Now, if your profile isn’t the problem, you may be just unlucky in your recent choices.  Try looking outside of your slimmed preferences (maybe no tattoos?) and hopefully you’ll find someone that isn’t named Amber..not that there’s anything wrong with Ambers.

Sean

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