Age issues

F16CA wrote:

Sean,

I am wondering if you can give me some advice.  I am 16 and have been dating a 28 year old for a few months.  My parents found out and are really upset.  They won’t let me go anywhere with him, they threaten legal action if they seem him even put his arm around me, and they’re constantly trying to break us up.  I love him and he says he loves me, so I don’t see it as bad, like my parents do.  How do I get them to understand that this guy may be “the one” and that they should leave us alone?

F16CA

 

F16CA,

At 16, you don’t know what love is..I hate to say that, but it’s true.  Sixteen year-olds often confuse the excitement of a new relationship for feelings of love but it isn’t until you’ve matured into your late 20’s or early 30’s that you really understand yourself enough to know what love feels like.  The other factor is this guy’s age.  Sure, a 12 year age gap in Hollywood is nothing, but in the real world, it’s a HUGE gap.  You’ll have very little to relate to in life, you have very different immediate goals and long term goals, and (it’s just gross to think of it on this level but..) think of it on a different level:  when he was your age, you would have been 4.  Would you have dated him then?  I don’t think so.

You like this guy, but in the long run it won’t work.  It’s time someone else tells you what your parents have been trying to say.  Deny it all you’d like, but a year or two down the road-maybe sooner- and you’ll see what I mean.

Sean

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