No drinks

FHG91 wrote:

Sean,

I just started seeing a guy (well going on dates with him by your definition), and recently found out he doesn’t drink alcohol.  One our first date, he declined a drink as we ate dinner and I didn’t think anything of it.  Our second date was a movie so we didn’t have a chance, our third date was bowling with some of my friends and no one likes piss-beer, so we skipped it, but now-4 dates (three weeks) in, he told me last night that he doesn’t drink.  When I asked him if he had ever had an alcohol problem, he said no, but then said he just didn’t like the taste. 

I come from a family of beer swilling midwesterners whose idea of a great weekend is boating and pounding through a 24 pack of Busch Light.  How am I going to take along this guy who will likely decline every beer tossed his way for an entire summer?  I don’t want to say this is a dealbreaker, but it seems like it would be too weird to handle.  Does that make me a bitch?

FHG91

 

FHG91,

No it doesn’t, but it DOES seem like it may be a dealbreaker for you.  I’ve dated people in the past that don’t drink, and

DSCF4361

I want this in my belly.

while I don’t come from a beer swilling type of family (we sip..gently..or gulp), I have encountered similar situations in the past.  It was usually my parents offering my girlfriend some wine or a drink before dinner and she’d decline.  My parents were always understanding and I’d hope yours would be too.  What the other relatives do is beyond our realm of worries.  IF your parents are the “if you’re not drinking beer you’re crap” kind of folk, then it may cause some larger issues. If you feel like avoiding these issues, then by all means, let the guy go now before things get more serious.

However, if you feel like things with this guy are going well and that you want to take things further on down the relationship road, then you’ll have to figure out how to approach this with your guy and with your family.  The ONLY thing I CAN advise os to ask him to stop saying he “doesn’t like the taste”.  It just seems a little childish.  No one likes the taste of alcohol when they start drinking, they just suck it up until they get used to it.  If it were me, I’d just say “I don’t drink” and leave it at that.  Your call though.

 

Sean

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