Crazy on You

BeBe wrote:


You gotta help me.  I am an affectionate person, just to fill you in, but it seems to scare guys away, like the last one:  We had been dating for two weeks and I noticed some girl was commenting on his FB pics so I emailed her and told her to stay away because this guy was mine.  He didn’t like that and told me we weren’t even dating.  I was like, “WTF?..we slept together..?” and he told me that doesn’t mean we were automatically in a relationship.  He then said he didn’t want to talk to me for awhile, so I sent him emails and texts for two weeks until he suddenly broke up with me because he felt I was “psycho”.  I’m not psycho, but I am blunt..I go for what I want.  Personally, I think that girl may be the problem.  I think she’s filling his head with all sorts of BS, but I can’t prove that.  Anyway, how do I get this guy to see that we should be together?




You’re a friggin’ psycho.  I hate to be the one to tell you this, but you’re the type of woman that makes guys cringe.  Let me lay out a few things here:

1.  In today’s world, sleeping with someone doesn’t automatically put you in a relationship.  I’ve said this before..there needs to be a conversation either before the sleeping together part or a little while after that lays out what the two of you are looking for.  After that, you can figure out (both of you) when a relationship is appropriate.  An orgasm doesn’t mean his peepee is on lockdown.

2.  You say you’re affectionate, but I don’t really see affection here, I see bat-shit craziness.  Affection is defined as “tender attachment” but you appear to have mentally superglued yourself to this guy at the groin.  Relax a little here.

3.  Do you even know who the “commenting girl” is?  What gives you the right to talk to her at all?  I sometimes get people commenting on my FB page and it certainly doesn’t mean I’m sleeping with them if they leave a comment.  I have lots of friends and even more FB friends.  Comments are comments.  EVEN if she was being flirtatious, you have no say in the matter because you two aren’t in a relationship.  You were out of line here and I don’t blame him for distancing himself.

4.  If he said he didn’t want to talk to you for awhile, sending emails and texts isn’t a good idea.  This makes you seem obsessed.  Obsession is bad.  Bad doesn’t make you win in the end.  You should have just laid low and IF he chose to talk to you, you should have apologized.  I am guessing your emails never once contained an apology.

5.  Being “blunt” doesn’t mean you go for what you want.  Blunt means you are “direct or abrupt in speech or mannerisms” and has nothing to do with ambition.

6.  You don’t need to be with this guy.  You need to grow up (if you’re young), see a therapist (if you’re older than 20), and figure out how to exist in a normal relationship.

There..THAT was blunt.  I am giving it to you screwed this one up.  Chalk one up to it being learning experience and move on.