Married on Facebook

Anonymous wrote:




I am a 30 year old guy that is a bit confused.  you see, I had been dating this beautiful, womderful, 30 year old woman for a few months and things were going fine.  We’d see each other once or twice a week, text almost daily, and talk if possible.  She even said she was developing serious feelings for me, which I also said I felt for her.  The thing is, we weren’t friends on Facebook and when I finally did request her (and she added me), I noticed her relationship status said “married to _____” (guy’s name removed by Minnesodad) and they had a bunch of pictures together.  When questioned, she stated that this was her long time roommate and they just put that up because other friends joked about it.  She insisted she was single, but now whenever plans don’t work out, I worry it’s because she’s not really single.  I guess I’m worried that I may be the “other man” and that she was never single this whole time, she was just looking for a way out of her marriage or some infidelity.  What do you think?








I don’t think this woman was single.  I know people that joke about being married by changing their Facebook status, but these are usually high schoolers and immature 20-something year olds, not mature, 30 year old women.  These days, Facebook says SO much about who you are, and whether or not she has a roommate that she may jokingly be “married” to, she should be wise enough to understand that if she’s seeing someone, that behavior should change.  The older we get, the more seriously we have a tendency to view relationships.


Image representing Facebook as depicted in Cru...
Lots of faces.


That said, I don’t think this woman IS single.  In fact, I think she is married and was just using you for sex/a way out/or whatever else she had in mind.


I don’t know if you have had a talk with her since then, but I’d explain things to her and see what comes from that.  Explain to her that you find the facebook status to be somewhat of a dealbreaker (if it is) and explain that you’d like her to explain more.  Either you’ll come to an understanding, you’ll find out she IS married, or you’ll end things as they are.


Good luck.