Sean, my husband says he hates it when I call him my partner because it, in his words, sounds “gay’. I like it because it isn’t offensive to anyone. Who is right?
I don’t think this is a matter of right and wrong here Gail, just personal preference. If someone I was married to didn’t want me referring to them by a pet name, I wouldn’t use that name. If he doesn’t want you to use it, don’t use it and find a different name instead. You should know though: I checked with a few gay friends of mine and they do NOT feel using terms like “husband” and “wife” are offensive. One friend said it best when she said, “I call my “partner” my wife because she is my wife. Its only the political system that doesn’t recognize that. I hope to someday call my wife a wife and have it be legally recognized as such. If your advice seeker feels weird using the term, tell her I don’t know of anyone in the GLBT community that finds the term bothersome.”
There you have it.