Fear love

Anonymous wrote:

Sean, how do I get over the fear of love?  I was once hurt and its caused me to fear being in love.  Its ruining a good thing I have going, so how do I fix it?


Loving someone fully, or investing in a future with someone can be a scary thing.  I think we have all been conditioned to only stick with what is comfortable with us or to “stay on the beaten path”, so to speak, and when we see that loving someone means work, communication, sharing yourself, and making yourself vulnerable, we have a natural inclination to fear it.

Love is unknown.  We all fear being left or hurt because we have been left/hurt, yet many of us don’t even see the “what ifs” that could potentially take someone out of our lives.  We fear the unknown of what we know.  Unless you’ve seen your own timeline or have once been given an expiration date, you don’t know the fear that I am talking about.  We can’t fear the unknown.  We could all be gone tomorrow and I’d rather say I spent the last minutes I had on earth loving someone rather than running from my emotions.  The unknown is the unknown.  It hasn’t happened yet, so try making the unknown the best it can be.

Love is work.  Relationships are work.  Life is work.  We can’t coast through any of them, but we CAN do the best job we can at all of them and reap the rewards. 

I bet many people reading my blog were wondering if I’d ever find love again, and I’ll tell you now that I have.  I have found an amazing woman that I love more than anything.  My Facebook friends and close friends have known this for some time, so I figured I should share this with the rest of the world.  She is wonderful, she challenges me, she makes me think, and she makes me feel loved every day.  I could go through my days fearing all of the unknowns in all of this, but I’d rather just work hard at this and be thankful for having her in my life.   

You can’t go through life in fear, Anonymous, but you CAN go through life with love.  Sometimes you just need the right person to walk into your life.