Strip it down

N27WI wrote:

Sean,

I am not a fan of strip clubs. I think they are dirty, sleezy places that promote the selling of sex and prostitution. Dancing takes talent. Taking your clothes off for money does not. I am no prude either, I watch the occasional porn video and have been rather open in my sexuality, but I draw the line at selling sex or sexual acts.

I am writing to you because my fiancee has his bachelor party coming up and I am certain his guys will want to hit up our local boobie bar at some point throughout the night. How do I stop this? How do I make them see things my way? I’d love any advice you can provide.

N27WI

N27WI,
I am sure there are people out there that would disagree with your viewpoint. While I have never really understood the idea of paying someone to take their clothes off, the dancing aspect is fascinatingly disciplined and athletic to me.

To answer your question, you can’t MAKE a group of people see things your way, you can only explain your side and let them make their own choices. If you’re not comfortable with the idea of your fiancee visiting a strip club on his party night, let him know, but also know it may happen anyway. Hopefully knowing you aren’t okay with him being there makes him behave a little more conservatively while there.

Most relationships are the same way. You can’t MAKE your partner do anything. All you can do is explain how you feel and ask them to respect your feelings. A relationship is dependent on mutual respect, not forcefulness.

I hope both of you find an understanding and you get hitched without any hangups.

Sean

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