Ham

Albert wrote:

I have a weird question for ya.

I just started dating a woman, but I have recently noticed she always smells like ham. Is this a medical condition or does this woman really enjoy ham? I am kind of afraid to ask her in case it is a touchy subject.

Albert

Albert,
I have never known anyone to smell like ham so I had to Google this one. Answers ranged from “You have a piece of ham lodged in your nostril, remove it and the smell will go away”, to “Maybe they use Baconnaise brand deodorant..”, to more serious responses like hormonal imbalances due to birth control or PCOS, and dietary issues.

I would just ask her if anyone has ever noticed she smells like ham. Don’t say it flat out, just try an innocent approach and work it into conversation. Maybe you can help her figure it out or maybe she will be willing to explain.

If not, douse your pits with some dijon mustard and slap some swiss on your thighs. People will think you’re the most delicious couple ever!

Good luck (don’t do that last paragraph for real, you may get a kick in the nuts).

Sean

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