She’s a fixer upper..

I’ve come to realize that marriage is very similar to selling an old (and at the same time buying a new) house.  Before you roll your eyes and start guessing where this is going, let me explain:

1.  Putting your old house on the market is a big commitment.  You’re signing up with a realtor and putting the fate of your house in their hands.  If you have a good one, all will go smoothly.  If you have a bad one, it can be hell.  This is like getting engaged.  You’ve taken yourself out of the singles market and put your well-being in the hands of a partner.  Have a good one and all will go smoothly…have a bad one and it WILL be hell.

2.  You start searching for new places to live.  This is a tiring process that involves asking questions, uncovering nightmare potentials, and many hours in the car searching for your gem.  This is similar to the period between the engagement and the wedding.  It’s a tiring process that involves asking questions, uncovering nightmare potentials with venues, vendors, and invitations…all while keeping the end goal of a fantastic wedding in mind.

3.  Getting an offer on your house.  This is similar to signing the marriage license.  Things become very real very quickly.  You are making the next move in a short amount of time.

4.  Making an offer on a new place while packing up your old place.  You say goodbye to childish things (mainly because your future wife doesn’t like your Arby’s crystal-glass collection or your future husband thinks your cat pillows are creepy) and you pack only what you want to take to the new place.  This is similar to finalizing wedding plans.  Yes, the DefLeppard cover band WOULD have been awesome to have at the reception..unfortunately Aunt Gladys (bad hip) and Grandma Doris (bunyons) can’t dance to the ear splitting rendition of “Let’s Get Rocked” like the used to, so that idea is out.

5.  Moving day.  You get out of the old place and (hopefully) into the new one.  Your life together starts with a place you can share and build upon together.  The thrill of a new place is balanced out by the stress of unpacking and organizing.  You find yourself wondering how the hell you got 15 pairs of toenail clippers over the years and how they ended up in a box marked “dishes”.  This is similar to the day after the wedding. Your hangover and thrill of being a newlywed is balanced out by the fact that you’re either going back to work on Monday or heading home long enough to throw the gifts in the door of your new pad, only to turn around and leave for the airport on honeymoon.  Get used to being busy guys, your wife will be making plans for the both of you for the rest of your lives.  Ladies, his socks will never pick themselves up off of the living room floor, no matter how often you ask.

Ahhhh…aren’t both heavenly?

In all seriousness, the house is for sale and getting some attention.  We hope to be moving during the summer sometime, but we need to find a place.  We’re also chugging along on wedding prep.  Invitations go out soon and after the bachelor and bachelorette parties in June, we’re almost to August!

Sean

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