I have a buddy of mine that is always asking for advice, but he gets defensive or standoffish if we don’t tell him the answers he’s looking for. What do we do?
Your friend looking for advice may just be a sign your friend is looking for someone to tell him that he is doing the “right” thing in whatever he is asking about. Many people would say that a good friend should always be encouraging and should tell their friends what they want to hear. I completely disagree.
Friends should be able to share their opinions and concerns with their fellow friends. If you feel a friend is making a mistake in life by not improving who they are, getting into an addiction, or just plain making a mess of their life, you as a friend SHOULD call them out on it and tell them you feel they’re better than that. There is no harm in telling someone you care about them and you expect more out of them than they may feel they are capable of.
I say be brutally honest with your friend, but also let them know you’re being honest because you care about them and that you’d expect them to be honest with you as well. Hopefully your friend will value this quality in you.