Girl code?

Nancy wrote:

Sean,

Is there such a thing as girl code?  I was recently fed up with the drunken antics of a female friend of mine and I left her at a bar we were at.  Now, she is telling all of my friends what a bad friend I am for violating girl code.  I have never heard of it.
Nancy

Nancy,
There us girl code just as much as there is guy code.  Common girl codes are: Dont badmouth a friend’s man you’ve never met, never date a friend’s ex (guy code is 6 months), never reveal another female’s secret, never leave an inebriated friend alone at a bar, never invite a friend’s enemy to a party, etc.,

I know leaving your drunk friend at a bar may be against code, but I think it has limits.  I say if your friend (whether its against guy OR girl code) is acting like an ass while drunk, its perfectly OK to leave, provided you make sure they have a plan for the night and they’ll be OK.  I have been guilty of being belligerent while drinking a time or two in my twenties, and I was fortunate my friends stuck with me, but if I was ever mean to them, I wouldn’t be upset if they left.

Chances are, your friend needs you around to lessen the effects of her drunken antics and she is upset because you left and it led to an uneventful evening. However, she is violating girl code by badmouthing you to your friends, so she is just as guilty as you.

I would advise talking it out with your friend and letting her know why you left and why you feel her reaction is wrong.  Hopefully she can see the error of her ways and understand where you’re coming from.  In my opinion, you’re not in the wrong for this one.

Good luck!

Sean

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